I think I can safely say I may have over reacted in my last Blog (Fame... makes a man think things over). I am sure it was partly to do with the approach of my 45th birthday, which turned out to be a great day spent that I spent with my lovely wife. It's funny but I have always found myself reacting in dramatic style to land mark birthdays. Maybe it's because life does seem to store up major events for key ages in my life.
Let's see. It started with birth. I was found to have a rare cancer, Adrenal Neuroblastoma, at six weeks old. I had been born with it, but it had been missed in hospital. So I under went years of treatment and was very lucky to survive it. Then at the age of five, I was given the all clear of this very serious type of cancer. But the celebrations didn't last long as a few months later my father died of a heart attack. At the age of fifteen, the age at which I was declared totally cured of cancer, my spine collapsed. It fell apart at Gary Numan's farewell concert at Wembley Arena, which kind of ruined the whole thing for me I can tell you, but completely collapsed the next morning. This was the day of my first exam. German "O" level. (No way was I going to spend a night studying for an exam when Gary Numan was playing!) I was rushed to hospital, and my school sent a teacher to sit with me while I took my exam. Strange as everyone thought I had cancer again and was going to die. Luckily I didn't, but it meant I spent two months in a terminal ward. That made me grow up quickly I can tell you.
It took quite a while for me to recover from this set back, and during this time I became an extreme New-Romantic (check out my website for photos). I spent my late teens looking like an alien clown. As my 21st birthday grew near, I suddenly felt the need to grow up. I dyed my hair brown, grew a beard and got a real job. This lasted until I hit 21, when I realised I didn't feel any different and went back to being a weirdo. Then I got sacked from my job, after I broke my toe in their lift. I decided to pursue a career in music. I swore that if I wasn't doing it professionally by 25 I quit.
As the age of 25 reared it's head, I was discovered by a TV producer and started my career on TV. This rolled on and I grew to be quite successful and well know. As I hit 30 (on my 30th birthday actually) I finally got together with my wife Diane. At 35 I had the car accident that broke my back for the second time. At the age of 40 I got married and I had to choose whether to have further operations to allow me to walk again. I turned them down, as I didn't think the surgery and years of phsyio with only a chance of walking again was worth it. I am also a very proud disabled person. The wedding was fantastic!
And that brings me to 45. This really is the middle of your life nowadays. Making it to 90 is pretty likely, so I now have exactly the same amount of life ahead of me as I have had behind me. I really did start to wonder what life had in store for me this time. As the big day approached I started to get worried, but now it has hit I feel fine again. 45 years is a blooming long while. Can fit a lot of living into that. Whatever event life has in store for me, I will beat it as I have every time before.
So please ignore my last blog. Put it down the strange fact that once you start a blog, you can put fleeting emotions out there for all the world to read. Today I feel great, and ready to face the world. Who says how I'll feel tomorrow?
(Just read this back. This is SO self indulgent. But hey, what else are blogs for?)
Nice blog post and yes you are right , once you do get a bit older , you seem to remember key events which happened, I am now getting to the stage where I can remember a hell of a lot and I have a pretty amazing memory I can tell you!
ReplyDeleteAnd writing a blog is a good way of fleeting your remotions , and it can be a relief when you write something down or just tell someone reading it and on social networking sites how you feel.
As for being self indulgent, you? Never!